Flushed Away

I had stayed out too late the night before and was exhausted. Though I hate to admit it, I'd been counting the hours, minutes and seconds until I could put my children in bed and curl up on the couch for some mindless entertainment. I helped Luisa with dinner....tick tock...we cleared the table...tick tock...I sent the kids upstairs to get ready for bed...tick tock...we cleaned up downstairs...tick tock...I urged them through pajamas and brushing their teeth and finally tucked them into bed. I came back down and collapsed on the couch with Luisa. I had survived! A few minutes later, I was zoned out in front of Grey's Anatomy when I heard the distant call of a child.

Vikki: NO! I hear Miguel yelling! Luisa: What's he saying? Vikki: I don't know. I can't hear him because of the TV. Luisa: Let's just see what happens.

Several moments pass and the distant yelling continues

Vikki: Oooo...he's really yelling now. Maybe we should mute the TV. Luisa (mutes the TV): Can you make out what he's yelling? Vikki: OH MY GOD HE'S YELLING "THE TOILET IS OVERFLOWING AND THE BATHROOM IS FLOODING!"

We flew off the couch and ran upstairs and you know what? The toilet was overflowing and the bathroom was flooding. I ran to turn off the water and Luisa began pulling towels out of the cabinet. Miguel was jumping around crying hysterically. Zeca came out of her room to behold the drama and was like, "Wow! What a mess!" I may or may not have yelled "Fuck!", a word my children had never heard me utter until last night. Water, water everywhere and not a drop to drink unless you like a bit of toilet paper in your water and then - ew.

We got all the water cleaned up and Luisa put the towels in the wash. Then, she said, "You should do the plunging because you are so much better at it than I am." As I stood there barefoot (my socks were a quick toilet water casualty) contemplating a toilet full of murky water and paper bits, it was hard to take her statement as a compliment. I gave her The Look and she insisted that I was really good at plunging, so, I plunged and plunged and plunged and plunged without success. My plunging super power had failed me. We contemplated several options and "Go to bed and deal with it in the morning" won out.

So, I spent this afternoon snaking the drain and oh how I wish that was a euphemism for something sexy. The good news is that the toilet is working again. There is also a moral to this story...something about listening to your children or being an attentive parent or maybe you should mute your TV when you hear loud, hysterical screaming. I don't know - I'm too tired from the compulsive handwashing to figure it out.