The Cat in the Hat Comes Back and Does Home Repairs

We bought something to hang on the wall but, as I contemplated hanging it, I realized that I wanted to paint the walls first. Then, I remembered that our kitchen sink has been leaking…since August. See, before we went on vacation, I reached under the sink to grab a new dish sponge and was like, “HEY!  Why is everything wet?!” but I didn’t really want to think about it too much because leaks are scary. Leaks could be the focus of an entire horror movie franchise. Imagine the voiceover, “It came from under the sink…and the hapless homeowners were no match!” Cue scary music and a choppy montage of people screaming when faced with plumbing problems. Rather than confront the demon under the sink, I made up a little story in my head in which one of the children poured a glass of water under there because it’s easier to think that my children are mischievous imps than to face the fact that the kitchen sink is leaking right before vacation.  We went on vacation and I was so relaxed that I completely forgot about the leak under the sink until we got back and I reached under there to get some dishwashing liquid and was like, “WHAT THE HELL? Why is everything wet?!”  and then I remembered the leak and was filled with sadness because I had hoped that the pipes weren’t really leaking but weeping in the face of their galvanized existence. The good thing about a leak getting worse is that it is easier to pinpoint the source of the leak. See…I’m a Sink Half-Full kinda gal. Anyway, I couldn’t very well justify painting the walls to hang the thing when the cabinet under the kitchen sink had become a watery wonderland. Let me say that our plumbing resume is as follows:

  • Replaced shower head
  • Replaced faucet in tub
  • Installed shutoff valves under kitchen sink
  • Replaced washers on toilet tank
  • Replaced toilet flushy thingy 

Since we did those things successfully, we figured that we could quickly disassemble the pipes under the sink and replace them and then make dinner and watch a movie with the kids. Simple, right? I’m sure you know the answer to that question without reading the rest of this. Let us summarize this project by examining the trips to the hardware store:

  • Trip to the hardware store #1: purchase p-trap and plumber’s wrench
  • Trip to the hardware store #2: purchase tail piece
  • Trip to the hardware store #3: purchase slip joint and big ass channellocks
  • Trip to the hardware store #4: purchase penetrating catalyst
  • Trip to the hardware store #5: purchase pvc tail piece, p-trap and slip joint
  • Trip to the hardware store #6: return previous unused pipes 

We needed to replace the p-trap but then had issues with the connectors of the tail piece and then couldn’t get the old slip joint to latch onto the new p-trap so had to replace it too though it took us forever to get it off. There was a lot of swearing. Luisa cut her finger. I hit my fingers with a hammer several times. Finally, it was all disassembled and put back together and it only took four hours…four frustrating, sweaty, damp, rusty hours.  

Once the sink was fixed, we could paint the walls and we did that yesterday. Now, we can hang the thing. The moral of this story is, of course, to never buy anything to hang on your walls. Ever.

I have a new post up at Grace the Spot based on our experience at the recent parent orientation at the kids' school. Check it out:

Attack of the Lesbian Clones!