Recipe for Disaster

Adult Protection social workers are a unique lot. We see the worst of what humanity has to offer. We see the horrible things that people do to each other and the destruction they wreak on themselves. It's a high stress job that involves more cigarette smoke, body fluids, roaches, bed bugs, mice, garbage, conflict and confrontation than is reasonable to endure. We know things that no one else wants to know - ask me about the power of a maggot sometime and I will regale you with stories. We are the people that tell crazy work stories at dinner parties and laugh inappropriately before noticing that the other guests are sitting in silence with sad eyes. We have a skewed perspective and gallows humor. In short, we are adorable weirdos with an edge. I've done done Adult Protection investigations for 13 years which probably explains some things. The job is tough and it takes a toll. We all cope the best we can. You know what's more fun than the job, though? The Administration! This is true of most places, right? Y'all can relate, so, here's the recipe for Adult Protection Social Worker Flambé:

Take 10 adorable but edgy weirdos. Tenderize (beat to a pulp) with a dramatic increase in caseload size. Sprinkle generously with additional paperwork and administrative responsibilities. Marinate in the insecurities of management. Then, douse the weirdos in gasoline before roasting them on an open flame.

Today, we found out through the grapevine that we're all going to be split up and scattered around the county. The first wave of people to go have been chosen and a date has been set but management will not be officially informing us of this for two weeks. The weirdos are not happy and the e-mails have been flying today. I don't know who I pity weirdos or the people who will be our new colleagues. I doubt we'll get invited to many dinner parties which is too bad because I have this great story about a plucky little maggot...